Cornell sorority's six page dress code leaked

Executive board of Pi Phi stoops to fashion fascism for rush week.

First reported in IvyGate, a blog about the Ivy League schools, and then picked up by the Huffington Post, the story about Pi Phi's Cornell Chapter and their six-page dress code has brought scorn and derision (aren't they the same thing?) upon the sisterhood of no-one-looks-good-in-satin-dresses-unless-it's-from-Betsey-Johnson-or-Dolce-and-Gabbana-you-weigh-less-than-130-pounds.

The edict of appropriate dress for all occasions is impressive, lengthy, bossy and super bitchy.

I will no longer have to present a column. Instead refer to Pi Phi.